Ride the waves

This week I started the third part of the medical weight loss program… a session with a counselor.

My doctor strongly encouraged it and mentioned to me three different times, so I knew it was something I probably should do to not get dinged (if getting dinged is a thing).

I didn’t know what to expect or talk about, which I suppose is a good reason to go and discover new things.

The purpose of it is to help delve into the psychology of bad habits for the overall purpose of changes that you can make for a long time.

It started off well, she was incredibly bubbly and personable, making it a comfortable space. She had standard questions to ask but made it an engaging conversation. It was also interesting to go through the questions to see where my levels of depression and anxiety were.

The depression always confused me because I always associated depression as sadness, and I’m not a sad person. Over time, I’ve learned that numbness or no feeling at all is also categorized as depression – which fits me.

And then for the anxiety part, my brain just doesn’t stop, no surprise. (However the medicine part of my plan has made a HUGE difference over the last few weeks).

We talked through my overall mental health and what she thought good next steps would be, along with some resources to get started.

One of the other things we talked about was handling difficult situations and how to avoid using food as a sense of comfort – and used the analogy of a wave.

“What happens when you give in to the wave? You crash. The wave always crashes,” she said. “Ride it out.”

This went into a conversation about learning to be okay with being uncomfortable in any situation, not just with food.

It was definitely something to think about and I’ve had to keep that “just ride the wave” in my head the last few days.

After trying different meal replacements, my body did NOT react well at all and it’s been terrible. I have been in physical pain, almost similar to when I’ve ate foods I’m allergic to.

At times it’s been hard to function. But I’m a busy person and didn’t have time to stop. (Although I don’t know how I got through yesterday!)

Yesterday I couldn’t even eat lunch at all and for dinner didn’t measure my food but did my best eyeball, eating foods on plan. Today was slightly better and even though I got home late, made sure I stayed within the amounts.

Riding out that wave….

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