I hate the waiting game. Sure, when it’s like a day or two days long, it’s the worst but not the WORST. But longterm uncertainty bothers me.  The fact that I have absolutely no control over certain things bothers me. That sounds very controlling of me, but I’m not that controlling.

For the first time in a long time I have so many things juggling in the air and the only way they will work out is if everything else works out perfectly.

Since when do things work perfectly? Practically never.

So I’m really just squirming right now hoping things just fall into place.

I really can’t imagine starting from square one. I don’t want to. I’m ready for better things, things I’ve been looking forward to for…ever.