Detox, Day 3 (Final Day)

Yesterday was my final day of the Dr. Lindsey Duncan springtime cleanse. It does definitely work. Although I felt pretty miserable. Monday I had a dreadful headache all day, so it made me delusional. Yesterday, the last day, wasn’t so bad. I had a little bit of a headache, but it never progressed. I was starving though, and it was a dangerous starving though. I wanted anything and everything. Thankfully today I’ve come to my senses and am not going to eat everything in sight today.

So if I could “review” this detox, it works. If you have willpower and some cash to drop on the supplements, I say do it. It was a great kickstart and I knocked off a few pounds I’ve been trying to for a long time. Will they come back? Probably. But if I keep up a regular healthy regiment with exercise, maybe they won’t.

You were supposed to get 30 minutes of exercise on the detox. I couldn’t, I didn’t feel well enough. This was my first time though, I’m sure I’ll be desperate and do it again. I only got through three days. There is another Cosmo listener who was doing the detox along with me. She’s on her fifth day. Kudos to her! I don’t think I could have done it another day for now. But the supplements are good for a few more days, maybe I’ll do it for a few more days next week.

All in all, I recommend it. I think my system needed it. I wish I could have gone longer, but, my body was saying “Okay, I need food!” Which the food I was eating for the record was good. This is a healthy cleanse. It isn’t drinking weird lemon water and not eating for a week.


Detox, Day 2

I’m in the second day of Dr. Lindsey Duncan’s springtime detox. Let’s see, so far I’ve/I’m:

  • Rationalizing and making deals with myself for how long I will continue to do this
  • Had a raging headache since I went to bed last night
  • Constantly thinking about eating food. Anything.
So what have I established? I have a very unhealthy relationship with food. I shouldn’t be thinking this way. Well, I guess anyone would if you were sticking to a strict regiment. I think having a headache definitely isn’t helping.

Like I said yesterday, I’ve been yo-yo’ing slash learning healthy eating since 2009. I don’t know what the heck happened, I think I went out of whack. I’d say, since this all began, I’m back to normal….which was roughly 20 lbs. That’s a scary number. I freak about going back up. Then again, it happened during college.

College is a time where you’re constantly on the go and nothing is regular. Now, life is finally consistent and I have no temptations during the day. In college, it was easy to make an excuse to eat something to keep me awake during class or keep me feeling better. Or I’d get out of class by 8:45 p.m. and it was so much easier to pick up dinner than make it. I think I can attribute it to working for the campus foodservice. It was a blessing and a curse. Free food. But, I wouldn’t change my time there for anything. The people and experience was so great. (Despite all the drama that happened, but what job in the foodservice industry isn’t stressful?)

So I don’t think I’ll need to fear of going back there. I think I’m conscious enough that I won’t exceed a certain point. Because if I get close….then I do crazy things like this detox.

We’ll see what tomorrow brings. Tomorrow is the last day of being strict. Don’t think I can be productive during my time off like this. I’ll continue taking my wonderfully disgusting tasting Gogi, Noni and Mangosteen supplements in the morning. Spent the money, might as well. They’re healthy.

Detox, Day 1

Today I started Dr. Lindsey Duncan’s Springtime cleanse.  I’ve never heard of Noni or Magnesteen juice, and I just heard Gogi berries just …hearing about it. Didn’t know what they were.

At the beginning of the month, I wanted to make the month of July one of losing weight and getting healthy.  I’ve lost maybe 4-5. Depends on the time of day and what I had the night before. It’s the last week and I needed something good to round me off. That’s when one of my fellow Cosmo Girls recommended Dr. Lindsey’s detox. I remembered hearing about it on the show, that was the day I discovered Wake Me, a product that has since changed my life.

I bought most of the products, the Noni, Magnesteed, Gogi and Acai. Love the Acai Berry Juice. The concoction of the other three is the worst thing I’ve tasted in my life. At least lately.  I’ve learned the only way I can get it down is to plug my nose and chug like I did when I was five and I had to take gross medicine.

I decided last week this was it. I can’t “diet” anymore, or at least not for awhile. Since 2009 it’s been a constant struggle. I’m not sure what happened with my body, but it went crazy. It’s taken me two years to get back to “normal.” I’m wanting to go above and beyond, but honestly, it’s stressful to diet.

I’ve truly learned how to eat healthier. So it’s not that I’m giving up being healthy, but now i’m just going to BE healthy. And if I want to have pizza one night, I will. And if I want to have chicken and steamed broccoli another night, I will. I’ve needed to do the work to get back to where I am. Also, I’m sure once I’m ready, I’ll detox and/or diet again. One day I’ll be ready to go even further. But for now, I can’t. It’s mentally exhausting. I realized last week that I’ve been doing this for so long and it’s just so overwhelming. I’m ready to just live for awhile.

I just have to get through this week first, or whenever my Magnesteed, Noni and Gogi runs out. If I lose weight, that would be wonderful. And if I don’t, I’ll at least feel better.

Jaycee Lee

Image from Zimbio Website

Tonight I had the couch to myself as my boyfriend was working on a few things outside. I’m not sick, but not feeling well either. I curled up on the couch and hit up the DVR (those are amazing, by the way. I don’t know how I lived without one).

I’ve really been looking forward to watching the Jaycee Lee Dugard ABC special with Diane Sawyer. Tonight was the perfect night. I was especially intrigued after watching a special about it over the weekend–one that just covered what happened and the awful people that had taken her from her mother, Phillip and Nancy Garrido. Sick, sick people.

If you aren’t familiar with Jaycee’s story, I encourage you to watch it.  Click here to watch it on Hulu. I thought it was a fantastic interview. There were quite a few moments of silence. They were very brief. Enough to make you swallow her horrific tale.  Here she is today, able to smile. I especially loved the end.  Many pieces of the interview were outside. Birds chirping.  Sun shining. You could almost smell the flowers.

So many bring their own hurt, grief and pain upon themselves, sadly. And yet here is this woman, who had no control over her life for 18 years, happy. She says she can’t be sad. She can’t and won’t let Garrido win. The interview concluded with Jaycee and her mother saying love always wins. Maybe it was good. I can’t remember. But what I will remember is them being together. Finally together, after 18 years. Just imagine what you go through in 18 years. She missed out on all of it, instead lived in her own world.

I hope people can look at her story and make them reconsider some of the things in their own life they can control. It makes me sad when people stress themselves out over things they can change. While things are always easier said than done, it’s always one day at a time. It’s just getting that first day out of the way.

Cooking, or Lack Of

When I was around the age of 10 or 11, maybe nine, and my mother began to let me actually play around with thing in the kitchen, I would make what I would call “concoctions.” Perhaps this was me introducing some form of my inner chef–in which I do not have.

You see, I always had it built up in my head whatever this “concoction” was, I would master it and everyone would love what I made.  I was going to discover this amazing recipe with the very basic items kept in our cabinets and refrigerator.

Well the only thing I could actually make were actually boxed brownies. And that even took me awhile.  Everything from my “concoctions” to macaroni and cheese was a debacle for me. (Well, then I discovered Velveeta’s Shells and Cheese, which was easy and still a favorite to this day.)

So here I am, over a decade later, as a 24-year-old girl.  I have a few easy signature recipes under my belt however by all means can-not-cook.  It bears repeating. I can’t cook. 

Shells and Cheese, one of the few things I can make

For starters, it makes me nervous. I don’t know why, but juggling so many things at once in the sense of cooking, makes me panic. I keep it in, I’m not a debacle to everyone else. But if you try talking to me while cooking, whether it’s a question or just conversation, fair warning: I’m not listening. At all. When I cook, I devote all my energy to the task.

So you think at this point I would be fairly decent as I devote all my time and attention to the task.


If I have multiple things going something, at least one thing, gets abandoned. Usually when I’m cooking for my boyfriend, I leave my stuff on the back burner. Literally and figuratively speaking.  Why? I’m okay if I mess up my own. There’s this double amount of pressure though if it’s for someone else.

This entire blog is brought up thanks to an attempt to cook healthy this weekend. I’ve dedicated the month of July to getting fit and after a week of a certain diet making feel like I wanted to get sick at the thought of food–Saturday night, around 7 p.m., I found three things I wanted to make.

This meant I had to A) Make a list. B) Figure out if my boyfriend wanted to go to the grocery. C) Get him up and going to the grocery. D) Shop. E) Cook.

The menu was going to be Curried Turkey Meatballs, Twice Baked Spaghetti Squash with Pesto and Parmesan and Kale Chips. At this point, the last thing I had to eat were two turkey hot dogs around 1 p.m. in my panicked rush to get out the door to pick up a friend and head to a first birthday party of another friend’s son. (I maintained my self control at this party, only thing I ingested was a glass of caffeine free Diet Coke).

It’s pushing 8 p.m. and my boyfriend and I are well into our grocery store trip. At this point he’s helped me realize how late it was and I decided to nix the spaghetti squash. But I would pay $5 for allspice, whatever that is, and all other items for my turkey meatballs. At this point, I’m starving, and with a limited amount of menu items I can have, anything sounds good.

We get the items and leave–note I did at least pick up a spaghetti squash to experiment with. We’ll come back to that.

Curried Turkey Meatballs

Whenever it was we get home, he’s in a rush because he’s starving as well. It’s my responsibility to help him figure out the timing of his dinner, which he was grilling a burger and I was to make the dreaded boxed macaroni and cheese (couldn’t he have the same affection for Velveeta as I did? It would make my life so much easier). Follow this, I had my turkey recipe along with the kale chips.

I start whipping up the turkey meatballs, trying to read ahead on the recipe as I’m notorious for only reading them in the order they are which has screwed me. Mid-way, I throw together my kale chips. “Throw them on a sheet pan at 350 degrees for 15 minutes, that’s a piece of cake,” I think to myself.

Kale chips in, back to turkey meatballs. At this point, he’s wondering if he needs to throw on his burger and when I need to start the boxed mac n’ cheese. “Uhh,” I say, portraying this image as though I’m not even paying attention. In this case, I am, I’m just thinking. I have no clue how long it’s going to take me with the turkey meatballs. Only thing I know for certain are those kale chips.

He starts the grill. I manage to get back and forth between these turkey meatballs and stirring the mac n’ cheese. Finally, the meatballs are going and things are looking good.

Two seconds later, I’m realizing the mac n’ cheese is done, so I strain it–crossing my fingers I didn’t accidentally overcook. I notoriously do that and I know he hates overcooked noodles. He doesn’t get mad about it, but no one likes overcooked noodles. They’re sticky and gross.

It’s taking my meatballs a little longer than expected, but I figure how to expedite the process. I even almost threw the end part of the recipe together correctly.

Beep beep beep. 15 minutes is done. I’m excited about these kale chips, I’ve heard so much about them and was quite excited. What was not exciting was the shriveled brown leaves I pulled out on my sheet pans.

Not my kale chips, but they turned out similar.

“…maybe they’re supposed to look this way,” I think to myself. I take a second, pop one in to try it. “Burnt. Definitely burnt.”

Somewhere in that burned kale chip was good flavor. I know what I did wrong here. I know not to leave kale chips unattended.

Back to meatballs, oh, and mac n’ cheese. I have done a half-ass job at this point on the macoroni. I have the milk and butter out, not realizing that one–my boyfriend came in and asked where they were, and two–was looking for them.

“The milk and butter is over here!” I say excitedly, as though I’ve done him a favor. “That’s what I just asked you…” he replied. He starts to mix it in the small sauce pan I had them going in. I know it’s too small, but I usually make it work. Instead it wasn’t so easy.

I wrap up my turkey meatballs, but this is approximately 10 minutes after his burger and mac n’ cheese are done. Had I not mentioned in this I was making bacon too, for his burger?

Here we are. It’s probably 10 p.m. I take a bite into my turkey meatballs that I had stressed and slaved over. They were alright. Nothing spectacular, just all right. I don’t think I’m a fan of all spice. I’m starving and realize I had a little bit left over from what I made the night before, my cauliflower bake. This, I can make.

Spaghetti Smush

The next day, about the same time as I got this “bright idea” to make a huge dinner, I decide I want to take a stab at spaghetti squash. To make that cooking story short, I picked a random recipe, went into it without a clue as to what I was looking for, scraped out what I thought were strands which turned out to mush. I made spaghetti mush last night. I threw in some marinara and garlic salt to see how the flavor would do. Had I not messed it up, I think I would like it. Had I not messed up the kale chips, I would have liked them. Had I not used allspice, I think I would have liked my turkey meatballs.

One day, I might be able to cook. There’s hope for me. I still have the spirit that I’m going to make something incredible. One day,  I just might.